If you’re lucky enough to still have your mother around, but sometimes find it hard to show her you care, here are a few tips on how to break the mold this Mother’s Day.
1. PICK UP THE PHONE
Simple, right? Not for all of us. It’s become increasingly easier to replace real chat with virtual chat in our ‘busy’ schedules, and sometimes we often use that as a crutch. Maybe you’ve felt obliged to ring her in the past instead of feeling that you really wanted to. The thing is, she probably needs to hear your voice more than ever right now though, so dust off the dials and give her a ring.
2. WRITE HER A NOTE
Sometimes it’s easier to say how you feel in written words, we get that. Instead of sending a WhatsApp, send her a hand-written note. If the postal service is down due to the current situation – write it and then send her a picture of it. It will have the same effect.
3. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF
Do something positive for yourself such as creating a healthy meal plan, indoor workout schedule or download a meditation app, then tell her all about it. It will give her comfort and reassure her that she’s been doing a good job all these years.
4. IF YOU CAN’T BE WITH HER, TELL HER YOU WISH YOU WERE
Travel restrictions are real right now, so it’s very likely lots of mothers won’t get to see their families in the flesh this year. Tell her you wish you were there if you can’t be… It will be the best gift you can give her this Mother’s Day.
5. BUILD BRIDGES
She needs you right now, and you need her. So put old issues behind you and use this time as an opportunity to build bridges from now onwards. Don’t put it off though and if you have to be the one to take the first step – then do it.
6. BE GRATEFUL FOR THE SMALL THINGS
Your mother has made a lot of sacrifices over the years (often silent ones that you quite frankly don’t need to know about!) so show her that you understand and tell her how grateful you are. Even if it’s a jovial conversation about that time she cleared your gas bill in that dingy student house, narrowly avoiding eviction, she’ll get that you get it.
7. …AND THE BIG THINGS
No-one has the perfect mother – but life is simply better if you have a good relationship in adulthood. Try to work on it if it has been patchy of late, it will make for a more imperfectly perfect bigger picture for you both.
8. GIVE BACK
We are living in testing times. A bunch of flowers is unlikely to even get to her with delivery restrictions, and will perhaps seem a little frivolous in the current financial climate. Why not give back to a charity of her choice instead? It will show her that you care about what she cares about, and be a much needed helping hand out there to boot.
Ask her how she is. Ask her about something from the past. Ask her how her friends, how the family, and how the neighbors are doing. If you listen with intent, it will give you a deeper understanding of her and her life – which is now likely so different from your own.
10. MAKE A PROMISE
If you can’t be in touch with your Mum today for whatever reason, make a promise to yourself that you will make it up to her – and do it! Even if it’s as simple as not reacting next time she makes you mad. It all helps.